Vwhat?

  I was assaulted by, I mean, encountered, the “Vwhat, you don’t like agave?” Costco lady today. She’s the lady in the “Pure Honey” chapter in my book, I Punched Myself in the Eye. I actually didn’t recognize her until she badgered, I mean, questioned me, on my excessive purchase of Cetaphil Moisterizing Cream. I … Read more

The Crumpled Up Wrap Rap

The “Empty Under” got you down? That depressing space under the tree? It’s The Anti-climax; The Post-Christmas bloat. If you need a pick-me-up/way to relax, Download my book, see what I wrote. http://www.amazon.com/Punched-Myself-Eye-self-sabotage-imperfection/dp/1519102100

Black Friday

Black Friday   We see the headlines every year, the herky-jerky video on the twenty-four-hour news: The absurd, before-dawn throng busting through the Walmart doors, demonic eyes narrowed, headed for the electronics. Strangers literally knocking one another to the floor, some with their hands wrapped around a high-def TV . . . or around someone’s … Read more

Grateful

Thanksgiving is coming up. I’ve been profusely blessed and given outrageous grace. So here’s my list that merely skims the surface. The straight from the trunk, the creamy, teensy-bit-melted, scraped off-with-the-spoon top layer of the Dreyers vanilla ice cream. Also, I’m apparently now obsessed with Tillamook’s Marionberry Pie and Udderly Chocolate. Freshly laundered white sheets—the … Read more

The Mermaid Tale

Getting in my car in basically my jammies, I hit the 5 before five and beat the early-morning Los Angeles traffic. I’d packed my toiletries and clothes I’d need for my commercial audition in Hollywood and was getting myself ready at the Sunset Boulevard 24-Hour Fitness, above the Archlight movie theatre. Standing in front of … Read more