“They Brought it on Themselves!” That line is only one of many repeated ad nauseam. It’s spouted like it’s an original thought. Like the people who—when they find out my last name is Capone—ask, “Any relation to Al?” or like when John and I were in the elevator on the Azamara Quest cruise ship a … Read more
Ida Liked to Meet Her Standing on the Ponte Sisto Bridge in Italy not two weeks ago, I was listening to a couple of street musicians—one guy with a standard guitar and the other with what I’d call an ukulele. John was not far, but still back at I Dolci Di Nonna Vincenza … Read more
The Voices Missing in the Debate My mom tells me that when she brought me home, I cried. And cried. And cried. I was inconsolable for a couple of years, she says. It was hard for her. But she hung in there. I was an 18-month old, separated from my biological … Read more
Job Hazards of a Professional Unpaid People Watcher: The Decorum Chapter Stepping on the escalator at LAX headed for passport control and customs–and ultimately to the upper echelon of Global Entry–I noticed If-you-like-my-body-and-you-think-I’m-sexy Rod Stewart so close I could reach-out-and-touch-him. I didn’t, of course. Pullease. I have some sense of decorum. John … Read more
Beignet Day I don’t know where the idea to celebrate holidays originated with saying “Happy (blank).” Was it Hallmark? However it started, I think some holidays for some don’t begin and end with happy. I don’t mean to be a downer, people, I really don’t. But it has become increasingly clear to me that sometimes … Read more
Have One Best Spoon Two months ago: I wanted to send our Airbnb host a thank-you gift for her hospitality. A nice friendship had sparked while I was staying at her bungalow in March, and one of our conversation themes revolved around coffee. So, after I returned home, I found the perfect … Read more
What You See is Not All That Is I think what I have is a broken blood vessel in my right eye. Google says so. The white of my eye is blood-red and my vision is a little blurry, too. I currently look like a zombie cast member out of “The Walking Dead.” … Read more
Grace Under View We sometimes debate whether a professional comic went too far to make a joke or a point. The argument is like Ping-Pong. What’s vile, what’s funny, what’s mean, what’s PC, what’s art, what’s provocative, what’s smart—whatever. This post is not about that. It’s just not. This … Read more
Shorties at the Bar With two empty seats between us, I sat on a stool at one end of the bar dividing the kitchen and dining room, and my dad sat on the other end, his feet barely touching the ground. Figuratively speaking, he had “the floor.” My mom stood spaced between the … Read more
