At least twice recently, when saying goodbye, I’ve whispered into friends’ ears, “Thank you for your tears.” It was after time well spent, but my favorite moment was when eyes-leaked-heart. The tears represented both vulnerability and empathy; both were captured in these precious beads. Last Sunday, I heard a woman speak about the most important … Read more

Apocalypse~ In my then-imagined worst-case scenario If I had to get to my kids But my car wouldn’t go   I put my trust in my legs And my Asics became my wheels   My training was ten miles a day But even that was not enough I learned the hardest way:   A mom … Read more

Has any one supposed it lucky to be born? I hasten to inform him or her it is just as lucky to die, and I know it. I pass death with the dying and birth with the new-wash’d babe, and am not contain’d between my hat and boots… —Walt Whitman     Jack asked if … Read more

Google tells me, “Principled” describes someone who acts with strong moral integrity, honesty, fairness, and justice, adhering to a consistent code of right conduct rather than convenience or self-interest, often taking principled stands on issues and showing respect for others’ dignity. It signifies being guided by deep-seated moral rules, meaning actions are consistent with one’s beliefs … Read more

On Christmas Eve, 2022, this was the photo I used to do the unimaginable and announce on social media that my beloved son, Joey, had left this earth. In the initial fog of grief, war, and shock, I wrote a few lines, ending with the Job 13:15 quote—”Thou he slay me, yet I will trust … Read more

One Christmas, Joey gave me a bookend. Just one bookend. A single bookend, without its mate. He wasn’t a kid, far from it. Joey wasn’t materialistic, but he was generous. He gifted me things like poetry and letters, CD mixtapes, a bouquet on my birthday trip with John to Big Sur, and a scarf, to … Read more

As I rode along the beach yesterday, an epiphany suddenly boiled over. It was the kind of insight that had always been there, quietly simmering: the reason I love being in nature—and even if just for a moment, bloom with it—taking in the beauty of creation (ocean, streams, woods, mountains, flowers, wildlife, sunsets, Supermoon, etc.)—is … Read more

Once you’ve spent a Christmas Eve calling mortuaries for your child, subsequent Decembers are very long and very tricky—more like minefields instead of Christmas tree lots. Yes, it’s me again talking about grief. Why? Because people are everywhere, grief is everywhere. They just might be quieter than I am about it. Here’s a link to … Read more

I’ve seen two shows recently (Netflix, HBO Max) that feature characters who are “birders.” I’d never heard that term before, only “birdwatchers.” Personally, I’d rather be a birder than a birdwatcher—“birdwatcher” infers, well, distant observer rather than embodiment. As a kid, whenever someone asked which animal I would choose to be, I always said a … Read more

When I was little, my mom tucked me in every night. I was all hemmed in. After she left the room (not to offend), I would improve her work by smoothly gliding my open hands over the sheets, blanket, and finally the bedspread. I straightened any creases, wrinkles, or bumps on the fabrics, ensuring everything … Read more